Avatar and the Avatar Cadence (James Cameron, 2009-2031)

[Caged Horse]

Am I the only one who didn't realize how popular 101 Dalmatians was?

I hope I'm not the only one who considers it one of the greatest animated films of all time, but I digress...

[Noiretirc]

Well, I’m bored, and that news is fucking depressing, so here’s my Avatar rant. I succumbed and saw this last week in IMAX 3D. Like other IMAX 3D stuff I’ve seen, the effect is sort of cool for the first ten minutes then rapidly fades into the background and is neither here nor there. I’m sure there are undreamt of applications for the technology that will take cinema into new realms (hint: let Michel Gondry loose on it for some R&D and then see where we stand), or filmmakers who could make the technology artistically meaningful and aesthetically expressive, but this sure ain’t it.

Technology aside, as cinema this is pretty feeble. The plot and characters are so generic and predictable it actually resembles a Saturday morning cartoon more than most other modern action cinema, even of the lowest common denominator kind. Even those tend nowadays to a pretense of complication, desperately hoping the tides of fanboys will mistake it for complexity. In this film every character is absolutely stock and every plot development is telegraphed at least a half hour ahead. Even the individual ‘beats’ of each sequence arrive with thudding predictability.

All the film has going for it is its look, and though this is technically impressive, I suppose, in that it’s really detailed and in goshwow 3D, the lack of imagination behind it is stultifying. The visuals are straight out of the mass-market fantasy posters that you’d find in an adolescent’s bedroom in the 1970s, and the plot, with all its puerile ‘transformation and mastery’ clichés, come directly from the accompanying wet dreams. The only iota of interest is in what all these generic vistas would look like in 3D. SPOILER: They look exactly how you expect they would.

As a fantasy world it’s not even half-realised. Apart from the general staleness of it, it’s all so undifferentiated: the characters travel for hundreds of miles but never leave the same jungle, like an old Tarzan programmer, and the same flora and fauna laboriously introduced early on come back right on schedule for the denouement . I known this kind of mechanical narrative efficiency is considered the ne plus ultra of ‘good scriptwriting’ in Hollywood, but it’s always been bullshit. The film would like to think it’s all about wonder and discovery, but it’s as mired in dull functionality as its accountant’s spreadsheet.

If I had to find something nice to say about it, I’d note that Cameron can construct action sequences that have a modicum of coherence. But just because that’s a dying skill doesn’t make it much of an achievement: he never manages to construct one with a modicum of surprise, interest or wit.

OMG Dude!!11, but it made 2 Bil. u suck. Lulzzz.

Seriously though, I'm so fucking depressed. 15sec clips of this make me groan. And yet, everywhere I go, someone in the backgound is gushing over their second viewing of it.

I just wasn't made for these times......sigh.......

[Noiretirc]

I did get one genuine laugh from the film: when naked Sigourney appears in a custom-fabricated fern bikini (!) that serves no purpose whatsoever except to preserve the delicate sensibilities of the acned moppets seeing it for the umpteenth time (and, of course, in order to give the same boys something to whack off to that night).

B...Bu....But she's 60.

Maybe I should go and see this.

[solaris72]

B...Bu....But she's 60.

Maybe I should go and see this.

It's her avatar, which is more like 25.

[Jeff]

Could Avatar break 2 Billion? Holy schmoly...

Well, no

Just did.

[Saturnome]

My Firefox Browser is telling me that this link lead to a Ill-intentioned website («Site Malveillant» in French).

[HarryLong]

A link connected with AVATURD is malevolent!?
I'm shocked. Shocked!

[Jeff]

My Firefox Browser is telling me that this link lead to a Ill-intentioned website («Site Malveillant» in French).

No such warnings on Firefox on my MacBook. It's Box Office magazine's site. Maybe it was an ad that was marked malevolent. Anyway, here is the only relevant portion:

Sunday Morning Update (10:35 a.m. PT): 20th Century Fox is reporting that Avatar grossed $95 million from 11,327 screens in 120 countries this weekend, which pushes the sci-epic past the $2 billion mark worldwide.

You can also seem the cumulative gross on Box Office Mojo.

[Nothing]

Anything but an adjusted gross is meaningless. It still has a loooong way to go to beat Gone with the Wind or Star Wars (or, indeed, Titanic).

[perkizitore]

It may beat Titanic in terms of attendance, it depends.

[Cde.]

Anything but an adjusted gross is meaningless. It still has a loooong way to go to beat Gone with the Wind or Star Wars (or, indeed, Titanic).

With television and dependably quick DVD/Blu-Ray releases challenging the centrality of cinema attendance, and the generally more fractured media landscape that exists today, I don't think Titanic or Gone with the Wind numbers are possible in this day and age.

It should be noted that the record gross of Gone with the Wind has been boosted through a large number of rereleases over the decades.

[Caged Horse]

I think this article and its accompanying illustration say all that needs to be said:

http://www.cartoonbrew.com/ideas-commen ... cters.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Mind you, if my movie was being likened (100% justifiably) to something as po-faced and pretentious as that big heap pile of buffalo dung Pocahontas, easily in the running for the most misconceived and mendacious animated feature ever, then I too might want to deny any association with animation!

[Kirkinson]

Palestinian Protesters Dress As 'Avatar' Characters

[swo17]

For all those who felt it was the visual element of Avatar that held it back from being a great film, behold!

An actual quote from the reporter of this story:

I would love to hear more about the world of Pandora, and find out what became of Jake’s brother Tommy, and the future of our home planet, Earth.

[strangerinparadise]

I'm utterly amazed and amused that this trashy blockbuster is generating an incredible amount of discussion on what I thought was supposed to be a film connoisseur's forum. 'Nuff said already! :-#

[jbeall]

I'm utterly amazed and amused that this trashy blockbuster is generating an incredible amount of discussion on what I thought was supposed to be a film connoisseur's forum. 'Nuff said already! :-#

Not to defend Avatar, but go and see how many pages Watchmen generated and this thread won't seem all that outrageous.

[tavernier]

Point/Counterpoint

[domino harvey]

I only got one paragraph into Kenny's defense. When did he turn into this?

[Fiery Angel]

I'm sure Cameron pays well.

[mfunk9786]

I only got one paragraph into Kenny's defense. When did he turn into this?

I turned into this (and I by no means wish to place a particular time on this) after I saw the film (and by saying so, I am not trying to claim that it's as good as it gets but it's pretty good) Avatar (but please keep in mind that I am no 'Avatard' (as it were (if we're to go by the phrasing of kids these days (who see movies in 3D))).

[Grand Illusion]

(

(Story Continues On Next Parenthetical)

)

[HistoryProf]

holy parentheses!

[colinr0380]

Hey! I'm the only person allowed to ramble on interminably using brackets around here! [-(

In other news, a very strange story about a book on Hiroshima written by an Avatar adviser and with the film rights optioned by Cameron, in which the author was apparently deceived by one of his sources. However since the work is described as non-fiction anyway, doesn't that allow the author to take liberties anyway?

[Kirkinson]

From the Hurt Locker thread:

The Hurt Locker may or may not win, but Avatar is definitely not going to win

Ordinarily I'd agree, but I'm sensing a pattern here:

I can only imagine the derisive laughter this trailer will receive from audiences this weekend.

$73 million opening weekend gross. Unless it gains next week (fat chance), this thing won't make much more than twice that in America.

...there really hasn't been anything equal to [Titanic]'s mass appeal since, and two giant kittens nuzzling necks definitely ain't gonna match it.

Could Avatar break 2 Billion?

Well, no

[Fiery Angel]

Well, with over 8000 posts, there have to be a few duds.