The Armond White Thread

[aox]

Easily one of the more vile posts I have read on this board.

[domino harvey]

Now, I've been familiar with Armond for a while now.... but this may well be the shittiest "list" I've ever seen! (I was not expecting a Melancholia bash AND a Tree Of Life bash in the SAME article!!) Honestly, I don't think Armond's a troll - he's just someone with an incredibly shitty taste in cinema. He's no different from any other detractors of Melancholia or Tree Of Life - Those people just aren't meant to be watching movie. I value human life, and all.... but I wouldn't be against ridding the world of people like Armond. I know I'm not saying anything that any of you don't already know, but I just have to vent. (Rex Reed should be publicly castrated [drawn and quartered??] to set an example. 8-[) It's funny that nothing Armond's done has pissed me off more than this, but......!!! (I can't even conclude with anything reasonable, so I'll just end with that transcription of a frustrated guttural sound.)

By the way, I offer the possibility not to like either of those movies; but if there's one thing you can't call von Trier and Malick, it's "pretentious" or "disingenuous."

Normally I'd direct you to Mubi, but even they don't deserve this

[Bill Thompson]

Now, I've been familiar with Armond for a while now.... but this may well be the shittiest "list" I've ever seen! (I was not expecting a Melancholia bash AND a Tree Of Life bash in the SAME article!!) Honestly, I don't think Armond's a troll - he's just someone with an incredibly shitty taste in cinema. He's no different from any other detractors of Melancholia or Tree Of Life - Those people just aren't meant to be watching movie. I value human life, and all.... but I wouldn't be against ridding the world of people like Armond. I know I'm not saying anything that any of you don't already know, but I just have to vent. (Rex Reed should be publicly castrated [drawn and quartered??] to set an example. 8-[) It's funny that nothing Armond's done has pissed me off more than this, but......!!! (I can't even conclude with anything reasonable, so I'll just end with that transcription of a frustrated guttural sound.)

By the way, I offer the possibility not to like either of those movies; but if there's one thing you can't call von Trier and Malick, it's "pretentious" or "disingenuous."

The guy doesn't like some movies that you do, life goes on, settle down tiger.

[Perkins Cobb]

I'm reading Brian Kellow's Kael biography and was disappointed to see there's nothing in there regarding Armond's life as a Paulette, about which I admit to being rather curious. He can be glimpsed standing next to Kent Jones in a photo of about 100 people attending Pauline's 80th birthday party, though.

[Brian C]

Rise of the Planet of the Apes> The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
Rupert Wyatt reboots the original series as a fresh, wild vision of modern frustration, defying Fincher’s apathetic wallow in pathology and brutality. Emotion vs. Style.

I have no problem with this one.

War Horse>Hugo
Spielberg revives genre esthetics as spiritual expression, defying Scorsese’s fatuous history lecture. Feeling vs. Sentimentality.

This, however, makes no sense. War Horse isn't sentimental? That's news to a lot of people, including, I imagine, Spielberg himself.

[Kirkinson]

Come to think of it, has anybody ever asked Spielberg how he feels about Armond White? I remember Kate Capshaw saying once in an interview that Spielberg is actually really insecure about reviews and reads them all the time, so I presume he must be aware of White's work.

[domino harvey]

Probably a "Praise from Caesar" scenario at best

[Perkins Cobb]

Very deft zinger at an unnamed Armond in this J. Hoberman encomium by Jessica Winter, who suggests that even White's name-calling is uninspired -- and offers suggestions for improvement.

[Tom Hagen]

"Relevance vs. Irrelevance." I love it.

[Jeff]

Jim Hoberman > Armond White

"Relevance vs. Irrelevance."

[swo17]

And yet how many pages long is the Jim Hoberman thread? :-"

[knives]

It's easier to deal with and discuss the negative than the positive.

[swo17]

Just sayin', if anything makes Armond White relevant, it's not his writing but ours.

[wattsup32]

Very deft zinger at an unnamed Armond in this J. Hoberman encomium by Jessica Winter, who suggests that even White's name-calling is uninspired -- and offers suggestions for improvement.

The zinger most likely to get our hero where he lives (whether it was intended to zing or not) is this one:

"Because nobody writes better about Spielberg."

[Perkins Cobb]

Yeah, I wondered if, or should I say hoped, that was intentional.

[rs98762001]

It's true though. Hoberman's review of War Horse was 100% on the money.

[dx23]

I think that just for shits and giggles I'm going to start doing annual lists like the ones Armond does.

Michael Jackson > Lebron James
Ben & Jerry's > Citizen Kane
Larry the Cable Guy > Tony Hawk
Herman Cain > Armond White

[dx23]

Armond White heckled, called Hoberman ‘a jackass’ at NYFCC Awards

[swo17]

I can't tell if this is part of the joke, but there's no way that was written without the aid of a thesaurus.

[MichaelB]

I can't tell if this is part of the joke, but there's no way that was written without the aid of a thesaurus.

You don't need a thesaurus to concoct a sentence like "Agree or disagree, you have to respect his lustrificent gangstranimity" - just a lively imagination and a wicked sense of humour.

[Jeff]

Clearly what White wants is for the NYFCC to kick him out so that he can call them racists and dilettantes, and insist that they don't want the voice of The Truth to be part of their leftist, bourgeois hegemony.

I say do it and let him crow from his "persecuted" perch. As long as he remains sequestered at City Arts, its not like anyone can hear him anyway.

[Perkins Cobb]

Nobody's that big of a douche. He has to have something wrong with him -- mental illness, drugs, alcohol.

[tavernier]

Armond sez Joyful Noise > Glee

[Murdoch]

To be fair, isn't everything better than Glee?

[tavernier]

What we've all been waiting for: Spielberg's Game Changers