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PostPosted: Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:25 pm 
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Joined: Thu Nov 04, 2004 8:22 am
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Holy shit.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 29, 2013 11:29 pm 
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Joined: Fri May 16, 2008 4:43 pm
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 29, 2013 11:36 pm 
Dot Com Dom
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Joined: Wed Jan 11, 2006 2:42 pm
Quote:
THE AXE IS BACK

First of all, knowing nothing about this film other than what that poster tells me, I think it's a genius idea to resurrect Lizzie Borden for a horror movie and I can't believe someone in the 80s didn't do it already. However, surely there's got to be a better tagline here. Just off the top of my head:

"Wait 'til you see what she has done..."
"Meet the original axes of evil!"
"Axe and you shall receive..."
"Get reacquainted with the original axe body spray!"


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 29, 2013 11:38 pm 
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"She WILL have to axe you twice!"


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 29, 2013 11:48 pm 
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There was some shitty DTV Lizzie Borden resurrection movie a few years ago. I can't for the life of me remember the title, but I can say that this movie looks even worse judging from the poster.

Edit: Duh. The Curse of Lizzie Borden. Blech.


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 12:19 am 
Not PETA approved
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Joined: Wed Nov 03, 2004 9:02 pm
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Is it bad that my first thought was "you mean that girl from the Simpson's treehouse episode?"


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 8:23 am 
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 12:15 pm 
Not PETA approved
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Joined: Wed Nov 03, 2004 9:02 pm
Location: Canada
Was more thinking of this:

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 2:57 pm 
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Oh, I know. I just love Martin Prince as Lizzie. "Forty whacks with a wet noodle, Bart!"


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 3:47 am 
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Location: Tokyo, Japan
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PostPosted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 6:33 pm 
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Joined: Sat May 30, 2009 5:50 pm
This...

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...says, "Oh my God, my parents have left me on my own and some baddies are breaking in!"

Whilst this...

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...says, "Oh my God, those shoes are just to die for."


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 10:03 pm 
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Joined: Tue Nov 02, 2004 10:58 pm
Location: Tokyo, Japan
"Why do I look like a girl?!"


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 11:06 pm 
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That's NOT a girl? I honestly thought this was a Next Karate Kid-type scenario.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 11:41 pm 
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Why am I not surprised to find Malcolm McDowell among the cast?


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 05, 2013 12:02 am 
Dot Com Dom
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Tank Girl's Malcolm McDowell


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 05, 2013 1:06 am 
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Location: sd, ca
An actor must eat.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 06, 2013 3:54 pm 
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 06, 2013 4:00 pm 
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It's not the way we're used to seeing silent films packaged, but there's nothing really bad about it.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 06, 2013 4:16 pm 
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I dunno, the yellow looks more like urine than sunshine. And I think they've tried to digitally tweak O'Brien so he looks like Ryan Gosling.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 06, 2013 4:19 pm 
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Joined: Tue Nov 02, 2004 4:07 pm
All that yellow was a natural choice because the title of the film is Sunrise. They could have made it even better by putting a sun in the corner like a kid's drawing.

Seriously, though, if it weren't yellow it probably would have been blank white. I've yet to understand this recent mania that the big studios have for Blu-ray covers showing the actors surrounded by an infinite white void.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 06, 2013 4:51 pm 
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EddieLarkin wrote:
I dunno, the yellow looks more like urine than sunshine. And I think they've tried to digitally tweak O'Brien so he looks like Ryan Gosling.

And a stoned Ryan Gosling, at that


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 06, 2013 10:48 pm 
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Joined: Sun Nov 07, 2004 7:24 pm
Can I just remind people what a genuinely bad DVD cover looks like?

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All from the previous iteration of this thread. Y'all need to lift your game!


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 07, 2013 12:12 am 
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Location: Portland, OR
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 07, 2013 9:27 am 
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Cold Bishop wrote:
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We can safely lock the thread now.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 07, 2013 9:30 am 
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Joined: Tue Nov 02, 2004 12:58 pm
Are you kidding? So many more people (including myself) would have seen that film if that were the actual DVD cover.


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